Monday, March 18, 2024

Here's a post I put out on the socials

back in February -- but I just feel like I need to share a bit more about how God walked us through this - 

 

"So, to many of you, this is just an x-ray of a hand... but to me, it shows 20+ weeks of intense medical treatment that included 8 weeks of oral antibiotics... 2 debridement surgeries... and 11 weeks of IV antibiotics with a picc line.
I can't possibly say how very VERY grateful I am [we are] for this x-ray that shows healing! We came close to having a much different outcome. Thank you so much to all who prayed for Craig's hand [and my anxiety 😉.] God has walked with us every single day of these last few months, and we are so very thankful for His healing touch. So thankful for your prayers, for medical professionals, and for scientists who study and develop pharmaceuticals that help us be healthy! Next follow-up is TWO months!Please pray for continued healing -[And again, thank you.Thank you for your prayers.] #HardwickAdventures - ... for sure -- because our God is good to walk with us through it all -He'll walk with you too, friend."

 
Y'all know I have anxiety, right? 
 And there may be times when I can joke about it... 
 But I’m not quite ready to joke about this yet.
 For anyone who truly HAS anxiety, it's not often something we laugh about.
 But even in ALL OF IT, God is with us –
 
 For instance more than a few months ago I read an article about how an animal's saliva contains the worst bacteria we might encounter... and I believe God gave me that article so I would be *a little* prepared for what was to come [and He's done that for me in the past, too. And I know if you walk with Him, He’ll do it for you.]

 So when the incident happened at the beginning of October and Craig's hand blew up with red streaks up his arm and oozing pus, I was not surprised... My anxiety kicked in when the decision was made to postpone going to the doctor [so many reasons for that, some of which I completely agreed with -] Dr. Google told me this infection could damage his heart or brain, so TAKE THAT and my anxiety was at FULL SURGE. I'm praying frantic prayers - asking God to protect his heart. His brain.  
Pleading - over-and-over again. 
 And honestly, these anxiety-filled prayers are not new to me. 
And I feel guilty about them -

Because I know God hears my prayers -
Why do I have to repeat it over and over to Him? 
Again and again? 
Well, here's the thing - I think God wants us to bring it all to Him - 
our joys, our pain, our anxious times 
- He's always there - and reminded me once of how often David came to Him with repeated concerns... He wants to give us His peace [whatever our circumstances] and sometimes I need to vent it all out before I can rest before Him 
and know [TRULY KNOW] His peace.
 
 I firmly believe God puts people in our paths just when He can use them to minister to us - [Side Note: I hope He uses me to minister to others too -] and we have a sweet friend [ a nurse] who looked at it a couple of days after and agreed we could wait a bit to see the doctor as the red streaks did not seem to be increasing... 
He got to the doctor within the 72 hour period that Dr. Google told us was needed to confirm if a tetanus shot was needed - 
and yay - he was up-to-date on his!
 
 He began an oral antibiotic treatment - and I was so naive to believe this would take care of it all.... but as he began the second [or third?] round I started to be 
REALLY concerned - 
But I could hear God's voice telling me - I've gotcha.
You see, I've seen AND SMELLED gangrene before [and I know the consequences of not having it treated.] - Remember - my career was in adult protective services.... 
And while I could not smell it... it DID look pretty bad 
[I'll refrain from sharing photos...] 
My anxiety kicked up another notch or two - Craig is [always] so optimistic 
[something I LOVE ABOUT HIM]
and felt it was still healing... until he was with another nurse friend of ours who said, "You need to go back and get that checked." 
[Yay for God putting the right people in our paths!]
 
 And he did, and not surprising to me, he needed to have debridement surgery. IMMEDIATELY. This is something I've had clients go through more than once in the past... And again, naive me thought this would be the end of it all - 
Because God got us, right?
And He did hold us tight even when I wasn't sure about it all...
 
Because Craig's hand looked GOOD after surgery.
But it began oozing - again - we're thinking that's a good thing - the infection is getting out, but at the second post op visit he was sent directly to the infectious disease doc, who IMMEDIATELY began IV antibiotics. THAT DAY. 
And scheduled a picc line for the next morning.
   
My anxiety was out the wazoo  - is that a word? 
But God again placed a sweet friend in my life who shared with me that someone she loved had recently gone through a very similar situation - and was well now, although they might not ever have full use of their finger even with it fully healed. 
That was so reassuring to me. 
Because sometimes when I'm in the middle of something hard, 
it seems like I'm the only one... 
I love that God placed someone in my life who had a relatively good outcome.
 I won't lie - I was physically sick to my stomach about this. 
But God - He walked with me [let me vent] and gave me strength to show support when needed [without being sick -] and to do some medical stuff I really had no idea I might ever have to do. [Again, without being sick -]. 
HE reassured me over and over again that He's got this - 
and He's got us -
Craig went to the clinic when our schedule allowed, but I also administered several days at a time every week or so. 
During the beginning days of daily IV antibiotics, I just wasn’t sure I could do this – and I had two friends from my small group [from church] give me so much encouragement as they have faced HARD THINGS these last few years with their husbands’ health. I shared that I felt bad for feeling so [crazy] anxious and wondering why God should answers OUR prayers when others have much [MUCH] bigger struggles – and one of them said – “Judy, don’t discount that this is a hard thing for you right now, God cares for y’all – and loves you - just like He cares for us.” 
And that’s the truth, isn’t it? 
His love is all encompassing!
His love never ends...
So my prayers begin to focus on things like – God help us show Your glory in this struggle – Help others to see that we are depending on You during this time… 
But honestly, during this time, I just rested in Him.
I felt a little numb…knowing that He alone knew the outcome [this whole situation was not a surprise to Him] and 
that He’d placed wonderful doctors and medicine in our path… 
We just had to take the next step.

 

And the next - we were counting the DAYS of this 6 week regimen of daily IV treatments. We were being told his weekly blood work looked good... 
All was well with Craig’s finger -
 Until it wasn't. 
   
It popped back up with swelling and infection at about week 4. 
He could wiggle the JOINT from side-to-side. And that's not good. 
The infectious disease doc sent us back to the surgeon that very day. 

  

The second debridement was scheduled for the next morning. 
They don't mess around [and I appreciate that.]
I think this is the point that we [I] truly surrendered it all to God...
 I mean, I knew He was in control, and I KNEW He already knew the outcome whatever it might be... but I remember us praying before we went in for the procedure... and not asking for healing necessarily, but just giving it all to Him and asking Him to walk with us, whatever the next steps might be...
A second debridement is not unusual... but it looked AWFUL at the 1st post-op check. 
So I asked the question Craig and I had been dancing around with for a few weeks [again, thanks to Dr. Google...]

 

What were the chances he would lose his finger? Turns out: Very Possible.
 The surgeon took time to talk to us about how that procedure would play out. 
In detail.  
And again, I’m feeling a little sick to my stomach -  
 I was begging God to save his finger.
 
 And if I’m honest I might’ve considered bargaining with Him a bit too – 
but here’s the thing: Again, we knew God already knew the outcome.
 And we knew He would walk with us through it.
 And we trusted Him to be with us -
 And accept that there was a very real possibility that amputation might happen.

 

We were down at The Gulf right after this 2nd surgery.
 [This infection did NOT affect Craig’s enthusiasm for life -]
 And y’all, the ocean soothes my soul… 
 
During this time God started talking to me about being thankful in all situations… 
And I remember being decidedly NOT THANKFUL. 
So I asked Him to SHOW ME things to be thankful for… 
Day-by-day He showed me more and more good things in the bad…
 
SO THANKFUL for every un-named person who studies and creates the modern medicines we have today. Thankful for anyone who is willing to be a test patient…Thankful doctors who are experts in their fields… Thankful for friends who speak truth and encouragement in our lives… Thankful Craig had no pain throughout it all … Thankful for his optimistic attitude… The list went on and on as God showed me things He had placed in our path. And I relaxed into His peace.

 

We really had no idea what that follow-up appointment in February might show.
 [And I’ll admit that I kinda wanted him to stay on IV antibiotics a bit longer… 
you know, just in case it was needed.] 
So,  back to the x-ray at the beginning of this post – we were so, so thankful to see bone growth. So thankful for every single person that God put in our path these last few months [and those who came before us and studied infections of this kind and developed ways to treat them.] 
We give Him all the glory.
 
 And we’ve learned to offer grace because 
we all do things without thinking at some point in our lives.
 We just need to learn from them and move on…
 and realize that NOTHING is a surprise to our God. He wants us to lean into His goodness and trust that He will be with us every step along the way – loving us, offering His unfathomable peace, even in the bad things in life.
Some things are certain in this life we live:
The moon is always round and God is always good.

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